Myths About Singles (Part 1)

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MYTH #2: WE ARE LESS COMMITTED

You know, for year’s single adults have had a bad rap for being less committed. This is such a joke to me. Why? Well, if you serve in church long enough you realize there are a ton of marrieds who are also not committed. Tons of wives that show up without husbands and vice versa. Tons of parents serving without their children showing up. It’s not a singles problem but a people problem.

I think the problem is that because singles are alone, when they may not show up for a commitment of some kind, you automatically assume they aren’t committed. However, when a married person shows up without their spouse who also committed to something, you think in your mind, they have both showed up because one them did. When in fact, it’s the same problem. Somebody didn’t show up for a commitment. So the real issue is getting God’s people to follow-through with what they committed too.

I know for myself, when my church valued my opinion, involved me in the leadership of the church, called me by name, took the time to get to know me, treated me like an adult, etc. I was committed. In fact, my home church had leadership positions of 3 years at a time. I was on several of these over the years. I never thought twice about making the decision to serve this long. Sure, as a single I could get married and want to quit but you know what, marrieds  have things happen in their lives that cause them to quit as well. Like singles, our parents get sick, jobs change, children need extra attention, etc. Simply, life changes.

So next time, you think…singles have more time or they are less committed, realize we are just like you. We have the same clock, the same needs to be included and valued. Maybe to get singles to be more committed, you need to be more committed to them and set the example. So start today figuring out how you, as a pastor, as a leader can reach more single adults. Value their time, value their insight, and value their contribution. If you do, you will be amazed of how they can serve in your church. You will just be amazed.

Psalm 37:4-6  Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heartCommit your way to the Lord; trust in him and he will do this:He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun.

Kris Swiatocho is the President and Director of TheSinglesNetwork.org Ministries and FromHisHands.com Ministries. Kris has served in ministry in various capacities for the last 25 years. An accomplished trainer and mentor, Kris has a heart to reach and grow leaders so they will in turn reach and grow others. She is the author of three books: Singles and Relationships: A 31-Day Experiment, co-authored with Dick Purnell of Single Life Resources; From the Manger to the Cross: The Women in Jesus’ Life; and the most recent, Jesus, Single Like Me with Study Questions (includes a leader’s guide and conference/retreat of the same name). Kris is currently working on her fourth book: FAQ’s of Singles Ministry coming this fall 2013.

The Singles Network MinistriesTheSinglesNetwork.org Ministries helps churches, pastors and single adult leaders evaluate, develop and support their single adult ministries through high-energy speaking engagements, results-oriented consulting and training and leadership development conferences and seminars. Click here to request a FREE “How to Start a Single Adult Ministry” guide.

FromHisHands.com Ministries is Kris’ speaking ministry. If you’ve ever heard her speak, you know that Kris is the kind of speaker who keeps the crowd captivated, shares great information and motivates people to make a difference in the lives of those around them! She speaks to all church audiences on everything from “first impression” ministry to women’s topics to singles and young adults. She can speak on a Sunday morning, at a woman’s retreat or for a single adults conference. Bring Kris to your church today!

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About Kris Swiatocho

Kris Swiatocho is the President and Director of TheSinglesNetwork.org Ministries and FromHisHands.com Ministries. Kris has served in ministry in various capacities for the last 25 years. An accomplished trainer and mentor, Kris has a heart to reach and grow leaders so they will in turn reach and grow others. She is the author of three books: Singles and Relationships: A 31-Day Experiment, co-authored with Dick Purnell of Single Life Resources; From the Manger to the Cross: The Women in Jesus' Life; and the most recent, Jesus, Single Like Me with Study Questions. Kris is currently working on her fourth book: FAQ's of Singles Ministry coming this fall 2012.

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