• KTropper

    My sister did left the church for a bid. She came back, but I am not sure if she fully back yet (wont add any detail in here). I know one reason she left is because she started to go out with a non-christian guys (she broke up with him). so that turn her down about going to church. I had suffer a concussion when I was 19, so I did not go to church until Christmas 2013 and fulling back until February 2014, because of headaches and noise. During my recovering I had never forgot it God’s love for me and the reason that Jesus died on the cross for me. I am still working to restarting to read the bible daily for the rest of my life. I never left the church after i graduated high school, i know that i was gonna be lost without him. I think a lot of young adult leaves the church because of the ways they show their respect into other people’s life. We should be praying for them, not judging them (only God is allow to judge them). My mom gave her life to The Lord after a year of marriage. My dad was not to happy about it. He just went to church just because he wanted to tell the pastor to leave his wife alone. So he did the transduction thing without actually believing in those thing. That kept going even after I was born. When I was 8 (I believe), I told my dad why don’t you come to church with us? Since that day, he started to believe in God for real. He accept it Jesus into his life and had a personal relationship with God. Thank you for this post, I now understand why my friends would leave church for a bid and why my sister did has well.

  • sick

    if you want to know the real reason ask the young adults. the church failed to show love like Jesus.. and failed to established that GOD loves them unconditionally instead the preacher always preach about their sins and sin is always the center of the message they always beat the sheep instead of feeding. life alone sometimes is depressing and then when you go to some church you end up more depressed and opressed instead of being strengthened and restored.don’t blame young ones for leaving bring Jesus, preach Jesus, show Jesus. people are so tired of religion.

  • Joe

    the church is out of touch and many “christian” will believe everything out of the bible, our of a preachers mouth, how about do some research in how the bible was actually compiled and why only particular, gospels or books were left out and who actually put those books together. The Church throws judgement where its not up to them to make judgements (gay marriage), most churches are Clubs. “if your not from our club and do everything we do we wont be able to be friends” – your no better than say, an outlaw motor cycle gang. open your eyes open your mind, the world has been hear alot longer than christians believe – so religion is out of date and you guys need to move on!

  • Eric

    In the Church where i was going, people seemed to be there by obligation not by heart. There was no sharing or talking to one another… People just got in, sat, listened to the guy talking, and got out. I really wanted to try but this Church falled short. The expectations i had were very simple, just to get to know one another… or at the very least the priest noticing someone new. For the couple of sundays i went to Church i noticed there was not a single men or woman of my age (i’m 36), only older people sometimes accompanied by their grandchildren. Sometimes i couldnt understand the priest speaking because of the bad sound system. Most of the time it was really boring. The only guy who was interested in me ask me, right in the middle of mass, if i wanted a love massage under the shower … i just left never to return.
    I lost faith recently… God didnt anwser one single prayer and ive been praying a lot in the last 4 four years.I’m starting to feel really stupid for believing and getting the impression this is all a waste of time and hope.
    If a king dosnt talk to is subjects, if a father dosnt talk to his child, if a god dosnt talk to his creation.. its pretty obvious they are not gonna care about you.
    Sorry for my English and its 1h00am here

    • Binu Mathew

      Hi Eric, I’m sorry to hear about all that you went through. I’ve been a part of a church that might be somewhat similar to yours but I had others that were my age too. I’m also sorry to hear that you’ve begun to regret ever believing. I would like to turn you to the Bible as the answer to all your doubts and concerns. Jesus said “Because you have seen me, you have believed; blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.” When it comes to communication with God, he has made it very clear what he wants from us in the Bible. I can honestly tell, when I started seeking God honestly and read the Bible as what he says it is (that it is from God himself) my eyes have definitely seen a lot more clearly what God’s will is for my life. Understanding the definition of sin and hell and love have all been very useful to gain a more Biblical and more importantly, a more truthful view on life and my purpose in life. When it comes to unanswered prayers, the Bible has something to say about that as well. Take a look at this post http://youngadults.ccphilly.org/things-that-mess-up-prayer/ God doesn’t work like a 9-1-1 operator. He’s 3 persons in one, all have distinct roles. As a father, he wants us to get to know him. Only then do we have a clear understanding as to this life and the next. I hope this has been encouraging and challenging at the same time. if you’d like to talk more, please feel free to add me on facebook, https://www.facebook.com/binu.mathew89. Take care.

  • Anonymous

    First of all, thank you for continuing to break the ice on this subject. Second of all, the definition of church is double used in your article. We are the church. period. Regardless if we attend a group gathering. This is what is important to teach our kids. It is God who is the focus, not the gathering, not the participating, not the fellowship. What has God called YOU to do? then be about it!

    Sorry to say, there are too many distractions in the “church gatherings” today. My husband and I attended for years, then with our kids, for years, only to be more frustrated as we left than if we would have just learned scripture from home. I lead children’s ministry for about 18 years, was published in two prominent magazines and I’m tired of how the modern day church is running/functioning. My son almost turned away from associating with Christianity due to so much hypocrisy in his Christian school (from adults).

    I just keep talking to the kids about who God is, where He is, and how they might be impact players for Him everyday. They may be the only Jesus their fellow students ever see. “Make a difference today, son”. No ministry has ever done this in a 45 minute period one day a week. Buck up and take charge of your own spiritual development and stop relying on someone else to feed you. You lift the spoon and feed yourself through scripture. When you serve God, then others benefit. Then you are loving your brother.

  • Young and Concerned

    This post exemplifies why young adults are leaving the church. The reasons boil down to, ‘Because they were never “real Christians” and we didn’t want them anyway.” It attempts to justify that everything is just fine, but does not solve the fundamental problems. The liberal vs. conservative theology issues aside, it should be obvious why young people are leaving the church. The church fails to offer young people a “home.” Young people are not as able to get involved with the church decision making and young people are not made to feel welcome. Rather than judging a persons faith in Jesus, consider making the church an organization to which people WANT to belong.

    • TimToolmanTaylor

      I thought each of the 3 reasons were true. It’s not the church’s job to develop spiritual growth in children. Well, as far as time is concerned, it’s 99% the job of parents, and 1% job of the church. 2 hours on sunday and maybe 1 or 2 hours on Wednesday can’t be the limit to a child’s personal faith walk. My wife and I are diligent to teach the Bible, and teach how to pray (they do most of the praying now), and teach how to give our time to help others. Wanting to go to church is a bi-product of that. People who live their weekly life, watching 50 hours of TV that is completely anti-God, but are farmed out 1-2 hours per week to sunday school class may as well have a fork stuck in them, since they are done.

    • DougMasters

      “‘Because they were never “real Christians” and we didn’t want them anyway.””

      You are deeply misunderstanding the point of that comment.

      Blame for people not truly being of the church is not on them. It is mostly on the church leadership itself. That statement isn’t one of blame or fault, it just defines the state of being that “Their hearts weren’t in it in the first place”

      Like anything, a sport, a marriage or a club if you’re heart aint in it then you’ll leave. Either you were unable to be in it, or you were never fostered in well by the leadership.